So I did it! I can now say I have a better idea (think reality check) of what I am really dealing with here.
Thursday, I went in for the portacath first. When someone tells you they are going to imbed a titanium object into your chest and 
oh by the way it is done with conscious sedation – one might tend to FREAK! Fortunately I had a fun young nurse who was all about “getting me to a good level” drug wise– translation – I had conversations I don’t even remember and didn’t feel a thing! Thank God!
Went from recovery from that straight upstairs to chemo – let the fun begin! I must say that the “good level” stayed with me all the way upstairs. Actually thought I might be sick before the chemo, but that worked out ok because instead of waiting in the waiting room, I got to hang out in the exam room, laying down with crackers and soda! Much nicer! Problem with being at such a “good level” is that I really can’t remember much of what the doctor told me before he sent me off to chemo with a handful of prescriptions – one of which was for a “cranial prothesis” – but we’ll talk about that later.
Chemo time and I had a good showing from my cancer posse with me (Mom, Steve, Pam, Charlie,
Shawn, Charis). The poor nurse had to drag in chairs to accommodate all of us. I think she felt a bit bad for me and the whole portacath, first time chemo thing because I got my own room with a bed! NICE! I needed it because I promptly passed out! My first chemo and I barely remember it – maybe that’s a good thing? My nurse did her best to explain each of the handful of vials she was inserting into my IV at various times, however I was in and out through it all. Hope the family took notes for me! I think after Valium and Benadryl I was pretty much gone. I have been told that I would occasionally look up – even ask a question, then boom – back out again! Oh the joys of drugs! To think I used to teach “Just say no!” – now I find myself saying “BRING ON THE DRUGS”! Ok! Ok! Just kidding! My family can relax – no need for rehab...Yet!
oh by the way it is done with conscious sedation – one might tend to FREAK! Fortunately I had a fun young nurse who was all about “getting me to a good level” drug wise– translation – I had conversations I don’t even remember and didn’t feel a thing! Thank God!Went from recovery from that straight upstairs to chemo – let the fun begin! I must say that the “good level” stayed with me all the way upstairs. Actually thought I might be sick before the chemo, but that worked out ok because instead of waiting in the waiting room, I got to hang out in the exam room, laying down with crackers and soda! Much nicer! Problem with being at such a “good level” is that I really can’t remember much of what the doctor told me before he sent me off to chemo with a handful of prescriptions – one of which was for a “cranial prothesis” – but we’ll talk about that later.
Chemo time and I had a good showing from my cancer posse with me (Mom, Steve, Pam, Charlie,
Shawn, Charis). The poor nurse had to drag in chairs to accommodate all of us. I think she felt a bit bad for me and the whole portacath, first time chemo thing because I got my own room with a bed! NICE! I needed it because I promptly passed out! My first chemo and I barely remember it – maybe that’s a good thing? My nurse did her best to explain each of the handful of vials she was inserting into my IV at various times, however I was in and out through it all. Hope the family took notes for me! I think after Valium and Benadryl I was pretty much gone. I have been told that I would occasionally look up – even ask a question, then boom – back out again! Oh the joys of drugs! To think I used to teach “Just say no!” – now I find myself saying “BRING ON THE DRUGS”! Ok! Ok! Just kidding! My family can relax – no need for rehab...Yet! (OK - WHO TOOK THIS PHOTO?
WHAT THE HECK?)
Being in this drug induced state, I actually made it through the actual chemo day not too bad off! Funny side note here is that my mother thought we should stop and get groceries on the way home (yep- I went with) and toward the end the drugs were catching up with me and I believe green was my new shade. She was so freaked out trying to get me in the car and back home that she put the cart away with the groceries still in it! So another trip back to the store for us! Not to worry, I hate to puke so that didn’t happen however close to it I was!
Overall, my weekend went well. A little tired, but not too bad. By Superbowl Sunday I was thinking that if this is it, what was I so worried about?? Then along came Monday! Yikes! We’ll just say that all my positive attitude and good thoughts about chemo walked out the door that day. Train Wreck! Think yucky, achy, tired, flu combined with some emotional side effects of coming off the steroids (supposedly these keep my brain from swelling or something – yikes). Needless to say by Monday night some of my cancer support posse came over to save me (Thanks Mom, Steve, Shawn & Diane). I learned that trying to tough it out sucks and that I should have called for help sooner (actually mom happened to call and check in on me – I think the sobbing may have given her a clue as to the problem). Maybe I’ll take this lesson with me into the next chemo??
So obviously by this entry, I did survive it and was actually doing ok by Tuesday afternoon. Wednesday I made it to work for a half day and Thursday a full one! Yeah! Guess this tells me that I can survive this. If Monday is as bad as it gets, then listen up cancer – BRING IT ON! (Yeah, I can talk all big now that it’s not Monday!) As Shawn likes to tell me – this may bump me, bruise me, even give me a bloody lip, but the end of the day I’ll end up still standing!
On a side note here, apparently the “prosthetic breasts” continue to be a fun for everyone event. Just about all my friends have tried them on now (I even brought them out of the bra at a staff meeting). Apparently when I was crashed out on chemo the cancer posse entertained themselves with them – not to name any names - Charis! At my chick flick/Superbowl party (yeah we only tuned in for commercials, scores and the last 15 minutes) Sheryl had her way with my breasts too!
Overall, my weekend went well. A little tired, but not too bad. By Superbowl Sunday I was thinking that if this is it, what was I so worried about?? Then along came Monday! Yikes! We’ll just say that all my positive attitude and good thoughts about chemo walked out the door that day. Train Wreck! Think yucky, achy, tired, flu combined with some emotional side effects of coming off the steroids (supposedly these keep my brain from swelling or something – yikes). Needless to say by Monday night some of my cancer support posse came over to save me (Thanks Mom, Steve, Shawn & Diane). I learned that trying to tough it out sucks and that I should have called for help sooner (actually mom happened to call and check in on me – I think the sobbing may have given her a clue as to the problem). Maybe I’ll take this lesson with me into the next chemo??
So obviously by this entry, I did survive it and was actually doing ok by Tuesday afternoon. Wednesday I made it to work for a half day and Thursday a full one! Yeah! Guess this tells me that I can survive this. If Monday is as bad as it gets, then listen up cancer – BRING IT ON! (Yeah, I can talk all big now that it’s not Monday!) As Shawn likes to tell me – this may bump me, bruise me, even give me a bloody lip, but the end of the day I’ll end up still standing!
On a side note here, apparently the “prosthetic breasts” continue to be a fun for everyone event. Just about all my friends have tried them on now (I even brought them out of the bra at a staff meeting). Apparently when I was crashed out on chemo the cancer posse entertained themselves with them – not to name any names - Charis! At my chick flick/Superbowl party (yeah we only tuned in for commercials, scores and the last 15 minutes) Sheryl had her way with my breasts too!
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